Things to say to busy booksellers

"If being sexy were a crime, you’d be guilty as Raskolnikov!"

"Excuse me, Where do you shelve John Milton? Because it looks to me like Heaven is missing an angel."

"You’ve got amazing eyes like Dr. T.J. Eckleburg."

"Have you been working out or did you just finish reading Infinite Jest?"

"Excuse me. Are you reshelving Fahrenheit 451? That must be why you’re so hot."

"Is your shift over? ‘Cause it’s Henry Miller Time."