It’s almost Mother’s Day. If that makes you break out in a cold sweat, you might ask yourself if you have a difficult mother. Answer these six questions to find out whether you need psychologist Terri Apter’s new book, Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power.
- Does your mom make you feel like the flying cow in Twister? “When she’s angry, everything that gets in her path is destroyed.” (p. 57)
- Could Chairman Mao have learned a thing or two from mom? “Do I resist my parent’s control and expose myself to the dangers…or do I succumb and give up my own desires and goals?” (p. 89)
- Does “Snow White” feel like your memoir? “[The difficult mother] is quick to attack whomever she supposes might be depriving her of the adoration she craves.” (p. 96)
- Does your mother offer you as much support as a wet undershirt? “Perhaps you cannot enjoy your achievements because you are motivated by the desire to please someone who will never be pleased by you.” (p. 130)
- Is Uranus closer than your mother? “Emotional absence presents a child with a paradox.” (p. 137)
- Are you making excuses for your mom as you answer these questions? “[Children with difficult mothers] inhabit a high-risk world that requires anxious vigilance of the mother’s responses.” (p. 9)
Go ahead, buy your mom the Mother’s Day card, the candy, the flowers, but if you answered “yes” to any of the questions above, Difficult Mothers is the gift for you.
Need to talk? @TerriApter is listening: #difficultmothers